from Banalities

/, Blesok no. 38/from Banalities

from Banalities

He arrived late, as usual
They wouldn’t give anything to help me
Can you hear it, Dave, that noise outside
Love Ana, Ljubljana is a nightmare
I don’t understand why everything is so wrong

***

I don’t understand why everything is so wrong. Let’s say
it’s 7am and I’m driving home from an all night party and I’m stopped
by two cops who haven’t finished school yet, walking over
like a couple of cowboys, accusing me of everything
so I can only wonder what I’m doing in this country as I step
on the gas and drive off. My ex-wife calls hysterically,
asks why I’ve been harassing, stalking, spying
on her all these years, I should just find myself a woman
already, there are enough of them, that I should just
stop, stop, stop. The guy begs me to hate him,
turns away, then pushes me, keeps on playing me
songs like Depression In the Eyes and Nice Day For
Death. I don’t understand what he wants to tell me. When
I retreat to be among people, a mixture
of downers, uppers and alcohol pulls me like
a whirlwind down to where I am constantly
nervous and can’t calm down. I live
in the most stressful town in the world. I try to
pull myself together, but my hands are shaking. I get scared
and they shake even more. I think about where
I could escape to, what place I’d hide. It seems to me
more and more that my life is nothing but strung-out dreams of escape.

AuthorBrane Mozetič
2018-08-21T17:23:24+00:00 September 1st, 2004|Categories: Poetry, Blesok no. 38|0 Comments