They say when you lie down
with a cat, father said, you get
up with fleas, which is the reason
you don’t see me lying down with
any animals. I slowly bend my back
until my hand is low enough to touch
the cat. Then I make sure to wash
my hands before I eat. Otherwise,
I’ll start looking like a dishevelled
cat, scratching myself constantly.
It doesn’t matter what the cat has
as long as I don’t catch it. So I
advise you to keep the cat off your bed.