Who the Fuck Started All This?

/, Theatre/Film, Blesok no. 13/Who the Fuck Started All This?

Who the Fuck Started All This?

First Circle – Meaning
Second Circle – Joy
Third Circle – Faith
A Clown
A Ballerina

A Dead Circus
A Circus Ballerina
A Barrel Organ with a White Ballerina on it

THE CLOWN
Now I’m going to say something.
(Pause)
Now I’m going to say something else.
BALLERINA
Did you say something?
THE CLOWN
I see you and I wet myself.
BALLERINA
Say something nice.
THE CLOWN
Perform fellatio on me.
BALLERINA
Very funny.
THE CLOWN
Let me give you a little, just a little. You won’t even notice. You’ll die laughing.
BALLERINA
This thing will drive you mad.
THE CLOWN
I’m mad about you.
BALLERINA
I’m not interested.
THE CLOWN
Neither am I.
BALLERINA
Now that’s a even bigger joke.
THE CLOWN
Oh, you think it’s funny. You haven’t got a sense of humour.
BALLERINA
It’s all you ever think about.
THE CLOWN
I’m thinking about how not to think about anything else.
BALLERINA
Oh, so you can think?
THE CLOWN
That’s nasty.
BALLERINA
And this is ridiculous.
THE CLOWN
I have nothing to say.
BALLERINA
I’ve got something to say.
THE CLOWN
OK. Then say it.
BALLERINA
We’re not meant for each other.
THE CLOWN
We’re not.
(Pause)
We could be on top of each other.
BALLERINA
I’ve said all I have to say.
THE CLOWN
How come?
BALLERINA
That was all.
THE CLOWN
There’s more. I’ll think of something else.
BALLERINA
Something else?
THE CLOWN
Something else.
BALLERINA
That won’t do you any good.
THE CLOWN
I’ll think of something else then.
BALLERINA
Don’t think. Let it die.
THE CLOWN
Wait. There it is. Dying. Quick. There isn’t much time. Come here. Lie down.
BALLERINA
I’ve had enough of you. I’m fed up with this circus. I’ve had enough of flowers that squirt water. Can’t you see that something’s going on?
THE CLOWN
What’s going on?
BALLERINA
The circus is dying. Try to understand.
THE CLOWN
Close your eyes and give me your hand.
BALLERINA
You’ll grab hold of something else.
THE CLOWN
You don’t trust me at all.
BALLERINA
No.
THE CLOWN
I could die for you.
BALLERINA
But you don’t want to?
THE CLOWN
Do you want me to?
BALLERINA
That would resolve a lot of things.
THE CLOWN
Wouldn’t it be hard for you?
BALLERINA
It wouldn’t be easy.
THE CLOWN
If you found someone else it would be easier.
BALLERINA
Yes.
THE CLOWN
Yes?
BALLERINA
You’ll be happy if I’m happy.
THE CLOWN
I’m very happy, when you’re happy. Only when you’re happy, my dear, something’s not quite right. One part of you isn’t right. Something in your head. You don’t have any problems with me. You have problems with yourself. You imagine things. You look at me, but you don’t see me. You need help.
BALLERINA
Am I insane?
THE CLOWN
You’re blind.
BALLERINA
You’re a pig.
THE CLOWN
You’re exaggerating.
BALLERINA
I’ll leave you and go and sleep with some idiot.
THE CLOWN
I didn’t hear you.
BALLERINA
Do you want me to tell you again?
THE CLOWN
Which idiot are you going to sleep with?
BALLERINA
The first one I find.
THE CLOWN
I’m here and I’m an idiot.
BALLERINA
I need something more.
THE CLOWN
More idiots?
BALLERINA
You fuck everything around.
THE CLOWN
But not you.
BALLERINA
Does that torment you?
THE CLOWN
You torment me.
BALLERINA
You know better than that.
THE CLOWN
OK. Alright. I need you. I need you like good news. Like the first cigarette in the morning. Like you in the morning. Like a bone to a dog. Like a dealer to a junky. Like death to a gravedigger. Like rotting waste to a pig. Like weapons to a soldier. Like war to an arms dealer.
BALLERINA
You’re lying. It’s too much.
THE CLOWN
I am lying. It’s too little.
BALLERINA
It’s over.
THE CLOWN
I know.
(Pause)
I wanted to say something else.
(Pause)
I wanted to say…
(Pause)
BALLERINA
Something about love?
THE CLOWN
That’s right.
BALLERINA
You’re going to talk about love?
THE CLOWN
Yes.
BALLERINA
But you fuck anything that moves.
THE CLOWN
Yes.
BALLERINA
That’s all.
THE CLOWN
There’s something else. You’re something else.
BALLERINA
You won’t convince me.
THE CLOWN
I know. Look one part of me is dying.
BALLERINA
That’s not funny.
THE CLOWN
It’s not funny. It doesn’t always work.
BALLERINA
Good-bye.
THE CLOWN
Wait. Don’t. You are… My Guardian Angel.
BALLERINA
Is that so? Maybe you have a wish?
THE CLOWN
Yes, I do.
BALLERINA
Me?
THE CLOWN
You.
BALLERINA
How come?
THE CLOWN
Oh, you know me.
BALLERINA
I know you. Is that the sort of thing you ask from angels? Why can’t you say something nice for once? Why can’t you say something else?
THE CLOWN
We haven’t understood each other.
BALLERINA
No. And now I must fly.
THE CLOWN
So fly.
(Pause)
Fly if you can.
HE KILLS HER
Now I’m going to say something.
(Pause)
Now I’m going to say something else.
(Pause)
I love you. And now I’m going to die for you a little.
HE’S DYING
THE MUSIC BOX STARTS TO PLAY
THE BALLERINA ON IT IS TURNING
A FEW WHITE FEATHERS ARE FALLING ON HER

AuthorDejan Dukovski
2018-08-21T17:23:55+00:00 March 1st, 2000|Categories: Play, Theatre/Film, Blesok no. 13|0 Comments